173 ⎸ Money Stories & Shame around Money with Wall Street Girl Next Door (Nicole Ayub)
Oct 29, 2024
Hey ambitious bookkeepers!
In this interview episode, we've got Nicole Ayub, the fabulous Wall Street Girl Next Door, sharing her insights on money stories, emotional hang-ups, and shaking off that pesky shame around finances. Get ready to dive deep and rethink your money mindset!
Listen here or on your favorite podcast player, or watch the video version on YouTube >>
Now let's dive into some highlights!
The Power of a Good Money Journal
Nicole shared an enlightening approach to kickstarting our financial awareness—journaling. Yep, I'm talking about writing a letter to money itself. By putting pen to paper, you might uncover emotions such as anger or anxiety you weren't even consciously aware of. I know, it sounds a little woo-woo, but trust me, it works. The aim is to pinpoint what's messing with your financial zen and what makes you a happy camper. Don't skimp on the good stuff—celebrate those positive notes, too!
Let’s Be Financially Loud
One of the standout moments in our chat was the idea of "loud budgeting." Ever hesitate to admit you're on a budget? It's time to get vocal. Be upfront about financial goals with your circle—it's liberating and can actually trigger positive changes. You might even inspire others who are quietly grappling with similar challenges. Plus, it opens up possibilities for creative, budget-friendly activities that everyone will appreciate.
Spinning Your Money Story
We all have what Nicole calls a "money story"—the beliefs and behaviors about money passed down from our family and life experiences. Whether it's excessive spending or a scarcity mindset, most of our financial habits have roots in our past. The goal? Recognize these origins and rewrite the script, which requires ongoing work but makes a world of difference in how we manage money.
Embracing Financial Shame as a Catalyst
Shame is a sneaky gremlin that lurks behind many of our financial missteps. Nicole pointed out the distinction between feeling like "I am bad with money" (shame) versus "I did something bad with money" (guilt). The former is personal and paralyzing, and unfortunately, society dishes out a hefty dose of it, particularly for women. But here's where we flip the script—by discussing our financial concerns with trusted individuals, we start breaking the shame cycle.
Shifting the Internal State: The "Be, Do, Have" Model
The "be, do, have" model turned out to be a gem in our conversation. It's all about becoming who you envision—starting from internal change—before taking steps to achieve your goals. It’s fascinating how our mindset influences our actions and, eventually, the results we get. So, if there’s one takeaway, it's to focus on your internal state and watch your financial relationship transform.
Personal Finance is Emotional Work
Nicole emphasized that handling personal finance inevitably involves addressing emotional issues. Honestly, it's much like therapy! The emotional aspects like fear, scarcity, and shame need tackling, because they drive our financial behaviors. Don’t shy away from this introspection; it’s an invaluable step towards building financial independence and confidence.
Next Steps
As always, thanks for being part of this journey with us at The Ambitious Bookkeeper Podcast. Remember, understanding our money story and reframing how we talk about finances can truly open the door to a healthier, happier financial life.
Feeling inspired to dive deeper? Nicole’s creating amazing opportunities for this very work with her upcoming programs in the new year. A monthly money healing circle sounds both intriguing and refreshing, right? You can catch up with Nicole on Instagram (@wallstreetgirlnextdoor) or on her podcast, "The Money Diaries," for more insights and inspiration!
Connect with Nicole
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For experienced bookkeepers & accountants:
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